Saturday, September 02, 2006

Hard decisions

The hard decision.
Which is it?
Is it the "Phy ought to just disappear" or is it the "Phy will stick around and not expect to gain anything out of it."

All you out there,
How many of you truly understand the entire situation?
None of you.
Some of you, only part of it.
Perhaps one side of it.
Some, perhaps abit of each side.

To me, the harder decision to make would be to stick around & not expect anything.
There is so much more pain and yet so much more I have to deal with on my own.
How many of you would go thru that much pain so that the other person can get what they want?

How many of you would wait for the person you love and not expect anything out of it in the end?
How many of you would bolt and run the moment you know the other person MIGHT not reciprocate your feelings?

My heart is sold.
Someone ought buy it back for me, I pray.
Rob, snatch, pay if you have to.
And my heart will be yours to keep.

You are so mistaken.
I don't expect anything.
I only always question why someone who claims cares so much for me, will not do the same for me.
I only always question why someone who claims enjoys my company more than others, will not come looking for me or make an effort to ENJOY my company.
Is that true care or love, whether the lovey dovey sort or not?
It is not, not that most of us would believe.
I question the truth with which you claim your words hold.
Stop lying. You you and you.

No one cares this way. No one enjoys another's company this way.
Treasure your loved ones, they say.
Love is unconditional, they say.

Have I been hurt alot?
Yes.
Am I depressed?
The test I did said I was manic-depressive.
Do I need a new heart?
Yes. For I don't want to love like I do/did.
Do I need a new brain?
Yes. For I don't want to remember the pain.

Posted by PhyQuirks. at 1:33 pm 2 comments